What would be a good present for a little boy who loves animals but has no place to live? That’s what I was doing at Rite-Aid today: trying to figure that out.
I was down the street at the Hollywood A-Boy picking something up and didn’t even need anything at Rite-Aid. Somehow I felt myself heading in that direction. I turned the corner and noticed a small crowd in front of the store, right by the sign that said “FLU SHOTS TODAY”. As I got closer I realized it was just a couple with their child and a lot of stuff in big plastic bags.
Then the young woman started walking toward me. She was in her twenties, with a fresh and pretty face. “Should I try to get some bus tickets?” she called back to the man. “I guess so,” he said. “But then we won’t be able to get anything to eat.”
He was a tall handsome guy standing in front of a cardboard sign that said “Homeless family. Staying in shelter. Hungry.” Next to him was a child’s stroller piled high with blankets. Could they be on the streets with a baby? I wondered. When I looked more closely, I saw that there was a kid in there; a kid too big to be in a stroller. “Hi!” I said. “How are you doing?” The boy looked up with clear blue eyes.
“I’m good,” he said. “What kind of dog do you think this is?” He was holding a little plastic dog about an inch long. “I guess it looks like a cocker spaniel,” I decided. “You like dogs?” He said he did; that he likes all animals, especially lions and tigers. But not real ones. Â He said he was five years old.
I asked the dad how they landed on the street and he told me he lost his job as a painter. His friend’s business went under and he got let go. They had no savings and couldn’t pay rent. BAM, there they were. The shelter was about five miles east and they had walked all the way. There would be a free meal at lunch time nearby. Soon.
The boy said his name was Alexie. Junior, like his dad. He had a few pieces of candy on his lap and was slowly unwrapping and eating them, one by one. “Nice talking to you both,” I said. Alexie Sr. smiled at me and said, “You, too.” Then I ducked into the store.
What do you get for a boy who has nothing?
I wandered down the toy aisle at Rite-Aid. A giant pirate sword? My kids would have loved that but it was way too big to schlep around from shelter to shelter. I found a dinosaur that doubled as a flashlight but then realized it made a giant “ROAR” every time you turned the light on. Probably not a good idea.
A drawer full of money? That could be lots of fun, but for this kid it would be a cruel joke.
The rack was covered with cheap toys, all of which were now laden with meaning. Hand cuffs portending a life of crime? A smart phone so he could call for help?
Then I saw the perfect thing: a miniature dog crate with a little stuffed dog inside. There was even a toy dog groomer kit. The label on the top pretty much broke my heart.
The perfect thing
I paid for the toy and went back out front. The three of them were together now, standing in a bunch. A woman came up and handed Alexie Sr. a dollar. “Thank you, Ma’am!” he said.
I gave Junior the toy and his mom said, “Oh, wow! That’s so nice of you!” Then, to Alexie: “What do you say?”
“Thank you,” he said. He seemed to love it. “Look, Dad! There’s a doggie inside!” He pulled out the toy comb, scissors and mirror. “Look at this!”
Alexie, Jr. Age 5
Mom said her name was Crystal. “I grew up really poor, so I’m used to it,” she said. “But I don’t want him to be used to it.” She cocked her head towards her son and her eyes filled with tears.
I had a hundred in my pocket and I pulled it out and handed it to her. “I hope this helps a little bit.”
Time stood still for a second as both she and her husband just stared. “Oh, my god!” cried Crystal. “We’re going to a motel tonight! Oh, my god! Thank you!” She reached over and gave me a hug. “Oh, wow,” I heard Alexie Sr. say.
Crystal started packing up their things. “Come on! We can get out of here! We can go get warm! Are you hungry, baby?” she asked Junior. He nodded solemnly. “Let’s go get something to eat! We’re going to sleep in real beds tonight!”
“I’m grateful for the shelter. I really am,” she rushed to assure me. “It’s just that it gets painful sleeping on those cushions after a month like we’ve been doing. There’s hardly any padding at all. Oh, my god. I can’t believe this!”
They thanked me again and let me take their picture. Then we said goodbye. “You have a beautiful family,” I said. “I hope things get better real soon.”
“Oh, they already have!” said Crystal, with a smile. When I was down the block I heard her call to me. “See you around!”
Crystal and the Alexies
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I was so glad when I realized you broke your own rule about giving the hundred to someone who was asking for money. This sweet family deserves so much more than standing at a Rite-Aid begging. Once again, you have made MY day, too, Jill – thank you for your generous spirit!
Thank you, Jane! What a heartbreaker this was. It’s pouring down rain and I like thinking about them safe and warm, at least for the moment. I’m glad to have you as a reader.
Your story brought tears to my eyes. For the grace of God there go I. I’m so glad you stopped to help them. I hope he finds work soon.
I just worry that people like this will unintentionally remain in the cycle of poverty. I hope that something breaks it, but based on the little information that I have, I doubt it. Even how they immediately spent the $100 illustrates the short-term thinking of someone who is doomed to stay in poverty. I once spent a very short amount of time in a situation like this family, and I learned that you have to save money that comes in to eventually make a real change in your life (like having a deposit for an apartment and the first month’s rent), even if it means staying in a shelter another night rather than a hotel. And there really are dozens of ways to avoid living that close to the edge to where a painting job means being homeless, such as both spouses working (alternate shifts if childcare is an issue) or doing whatever it takes to get a replacement job asap. I know that none of these issues are simple, but I worry for this family and hope they don’t live in poverty forever.
I’m so glad that the boy has his dog. I bet he’ll keep that toy for a long time and that it will bring him lots of happiness.
Breaking the cycle of poverty must be one of the most difficult things imaginable, especially in an economy where living wage jobs are few and far between and the social safety net is in tatters. If a small comfort can result from the kindness of a stranger that is a good thing. While it is not everything, maybe it is even enough for the moment?
What we consider “small comforts” are a matter of survival to others – shelter, food, clothes, sleep. When you’re homeless, and with a child no less, immediate needs trump long-term planning because survival is the name of the game. I hope they enjoyed their time in a motel with real beds and it sustains them through their shelter stay.
I am so happy to have stumbled upon your blog (and now that I think about it, I don’t remember where). I have been reading it for hours now, keeping me company as I work late. I work for a non-profit and sometimes, the work is just too much but your blog reminded me that there are people who are in need and their situation would not change if no one is willing to go out of their way to help. Thank you for being a blessing.